


JOURNEY 7: The Choice Part 3

by LighthouseHunter101



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Spirit Animals
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-13
Updated: 2018-08-13
Packaged: 2019-06-27 00:31:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,506
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15674397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LighthouseHunter101/pseuds/LighthouseHunter101
Summary: JOURNEY SERIES Story 7 and continuing the Sentinel and Guide story.  This is the conclusion to The Choice stories.  Jim and Blair spend a week at William's cabin so they can relax and change into their spirit animals.  William's unexpected early arrival changes all their lives forever.





	JOURNEY 7: The Choice Part 3

Bagheera ran through the forest surrounding his father’s cabin searching for his companion. William was joining them the following day but Jim and Blair had driven to the cabin a few days before so they could be alone to enjoy the freedom of being their spirit animals for a couple of days.

Bagheera heard a nearby splash and grinned as he knew exactly what it was. He arced to the left and came out at the lake’s edge. Chief was swimming in the crystal clear water of the lake.

/Bagheera, come on in the water’s lovely,/ the wolf said.

The black jaguar put a foot into the water, being a cat he wasn’t as confident in the water as his lupine companion was. Bravely he put a second foot gingerly into the cold water.

/Oh for pity’s sake, Bagheera/ the wolf thought and waded towards his companion. /It’s just water for crying out loud./

/It’s cold,/ the big cat replied.

Chief waded out into the shallow water by the lake’s edge. He stopped about a foot from the jaguar. The water was just lapping over the wolf’s ankles and water cascaded off his wet fur in streams. The wolf raised his paw up and back down again quickly, splashing water up and over the jaguar. Chief did it a couple more times more violently and water cascaded over the cat.

/Hey, Chief!/ Bagheera sent and then heard the wolf laughing. /Why you little!/ he replied and Chief turned back into the water and swam away.

Bagheera followed now and swam after his companion. Once in the water the cat enjoyed the sensation of swimming and he was a strong swimmer. He could feel his powerful legs pushing him through the water. When he caught up to the wolf he could see his tail still wagging, Chief was really enjoying himself. The jaguar caught the moving tail in his mouth.

/Hey!/ the wolf cried indignantly.

/It’s your own fault if you keep wagging that tail of yours. I’m a cat,/ he added by way of explanation.

Chief knew that like all cats Bagheera couldn’t resist chasing and capturing anything that moved. They swam for a while and then went back to the shore. They waded out of the water and then shook their coats of excess water and started back to the cabin.

Once inside the cabin Bagheera stoked the fire with small branches he had left ready. There were covered bowls of food for them in the kitchen on the floor. All they had to do was take the tops off with their mouths. Once they’d eaten they moved back to the fire and lay down in front of it to bond. Bagheera stayed in his spirit animal form as he knew that as Blair had lived as his spirit animal for a year and had totally embraced that side of himself; so, he needed to be in his wolf form nearly as much as his human form. Jim enjoyed being in his cat guise but for him it wasn’t as essential, he didn’t need to be in the form for any length of time. With William arriving at the cabin the next day there would be no chance for them both to be together as their spirit animals. But today had been all about their spirit animals; they would eat, bond and go to sleep in front of the fire in their animal guises.

###############

Darkness had descended on the lake side cabin. Bagheera suddenly started, he was alert and awake in seconds as he heard the cabin door suddenly open; the hinge letting out a distinctive squeak that his Sentinel abilities, accentuated by his jaguar ears, immediately picked up on. The glow of the fire was the cabin’s only illumination and Bagheera saw a silhouette outlined in the doorway. The jaguar cursed himself for not being more alert. Thinking they were secure and alone in the remote cabin he had drifted into a deep sleep. 

The intruder reached for the light switch on the wall next to the front door. Light suddenly flooded the lounge area waking Chief as well.

William Ellison took a step into the room and stopped in his tracks as he saw a big black cat standing in front of the fireplace with a wolf that was now getting up from a supine position.

/Bagheera, your Dad’s early,/ Chief said in alarm as he realised William Ellison was at the cabin.

/I know,/ Bagheera replied not taking his eyes from his father’s form.

William was startled at seeing the two wild animals in his cabin but soon recovered his composure and then he glanced to his left where the kitchen area was. Bagheera knew where he was looking; at the drawer where there was a gun.

A chill ran down Chief’s spine.

/Baggie, there’s a gun in that cabinet./

/I know, Chief,/ Bagheera replied feeling his companion’s apprehension.

/Will he shoot us?/

Bagheera was thoughtful. /As far as my Dad knows there’s a wolf and a jaguar in his cabin where you and I are supposed to be. I don’t think he’s recognised you, Chief./

“Jim, there are wild animals in the cabin!” William called and was perturbed when there was no answer. There were no signs of a struggle in the cabin, no blood or body parts as his mind conjured up what could have happened to his son and his dog Guide. Trying to stay calm and thinking that Jim was just asleep in one of the bedrooms, William took a step slowly towards the kitchen drawer where the gun was.

But Bagheera also took a step forward; he couldn’t allow his father to reach that gun. He would lose control of the situation then and that couldn’t be allowed to happen. When William took another step, the jaguar matched it. William could see that the black cat was matching his every move and he knew he would never reach the gun. He didn’t want to hurt the two animals but he had to think of his and his son’s safety. Slowly William reached into his jacket pocket and removed his cellphone. 

/Jim, he’s going to call for help!/ the wolf was getting really scared now.

/Hold, on Chief!/ Bagheera replied. He heard the tone of the 9 being dialled and he knew he had only seconds; he couldn’t let his father finish that dialling. Bagheera leaped. 

Before William knew what had hit him he was pinned up against the wall next to the front door by Bagheera’s strong front paws and Williams’s cellphone was in the jaguar’s mouth. Shocked William didn’t move and watched, his heart pounding, as the black cat retreated to the grey wolf’s side. He dropped the phone onto the floor and put a large paw on top of it.

William knew he needed a new plan, he was looking between the kitchen drawer for the gun or the front door to escape and go for help. William took a step towards the front door and Bagheera matched him.

/Talk about your Mexican standoffs,/ Chief commented.

/There’s only one thing to do,/ Bagheera replied pragmatically, this had to end.

Bagheera reached for the spirit plane. William watched in amazement as the black cat started to change shape before his eyes. Its shape elongated and became more human. The black fur retreated and became human skin and William was incredulous when Jim stood up naked in the jaguar’s place.

“Dad, don’t be shocked,” Jim began, holding his hands up in front of him in a placating manner.

“Who are you? What are you?”

“Your son, James,” Jim replied as he knew this had to be a terrible shock for his father.

“My son can’t, he isn’t an animal. This isn’t normal; no man can change into a beast and back. Jim, Jim, where are you!”

Then Chief began to change back into his human form.

William was astonished to see a naked Blair Sandburg stand up beside his son.

“Blair? I thought you were gone. I don’t understand any of this.”

“I haven’t been anywhere, Mr Ellison, but it is a long story,” Blair replied. “All Sentinels and Guides can change into their spirit animals.”

“Spirit animals! I haven’t heard of anything so ridiculous,” the elder Ellison scoffed. “Why haven’t I heard of this before?”

“Sentinels and Guides have forgotten over the years that they can do it, but I found out,” Blair explained.

“And you just had to do it, you had to drag my son into it!” he replied with venom in his voice.

“To a Sentinel and Guide it’s as natural as breathing. It’s what we were born to do,” Blair defended.

“I, we enjoy being our spirit animals, the freedom it gives us. The power of the jaguar as I run on all four legs,” Jim added.

“Enough, I don’t want to hear any more. I can’t handle this,” William replied going pale.

“I’ll make some coffee,” Blair said taking a step towards the kitchen.

“Clothes first, Chief,” Jim replied.

Blair blushed as he realised he was naked. Both Jim and Blair were so used to being naked around each other that they forgot sometimes. Blair smiled and then moved to retrieve their clothes. As they dressed William staggered to the lounge area and sat down on the sofa.

Blair moved into the kitchen area to make coffee as Jim joined his father in the lounge. He sat on the settee opposite to where his father sat slumped and looking dejected. William couldn’t make eye contact with his son.

“We were expecting you tomorrow,” Jim began as way of explanation. “I wouldn’t have been in my spirit animal form tomorrow.”

“I finished early and decided to surprise you. I thought we could start fishing earlier then tomorrow morning. I never thought I would interrupt this.” William sat back exhausted.

There was silence as Jim didn’t know what to say. A short time later Blair joined them with a tray of coffee, he sat next to his Sentinel. He could tell by the tension in the air that it wasn’t going well.

“When did you come back, Blair?” William asked.

“Blair never left,” Jim explained.

“I know I haven’t been around much but I kept tabs on you, James. I know your Guide Blair left and you had Chief a dog for a Guide.” Then William realised that Chief and Blair were one and the same.

“Blair gave up his humanity to save my life,” Jim said with pride and looking round at his Guide who was sipping at his coffee. “He became his spirit animal wolf for a year. Do you realise what that means?” Jim continued before William could speak. “To live as a wolf for what he thought at the time was the rest of his natural life. No one has sacrificed so much for me. Only his strength and courage allowed him to regain his humanity.”

Jim put his arm around Blair’s shoulder and drew him close.

“So you don’t have to be your spirit animals if you don’t want to?” William asked.

“No but we choose to be,” Jim replied.

“But why, how could you possibly choose to be a cat or a wolf?”

“Because it feels right. I feel as comfortable as my wolf as I do my human half. They are one and the same,” Blair explained.

“James, do you feel the same?

“Dad, Blair lived as a wolf for a whole year it’s hard to go back to just being one half of your soul after that. For me I don’t need to be my spirit animal as much as Blair does but I must admit I enjoy it. It feels right and it helps me focus my senses.”

“I’m not sure I can take all this in.” William picked up his untouched coffee and took a sip. “I need to think about it.”

“I understand, Dad, it’s a lot to take in. But if you have any more questions, just ask and Blair and I will try to answer them.”

William was looking at the cabin wall in introspection. “I would have shot you both,” he whispered. “I thought you were wild animals in the cabin. Jim, when you didn’t answer me, I thought you were dead.” The coffee cup shaking slightly in his hand with the admission. “If I’d have reached my gun I would have killed you both.”

“That’s why we’re careful,” Jim explained. “We tend to only both change when we’re alone. The cabin is the perfect place because it’s so isolated.”

“Until I barged in earlier than you were expecting me.”

“No plan is fool proof,” Blair added and smiling wryly.

“It’s alright, Dad, that’s why I changed back,” Jim explained. “So you could see you were in no danger.”

Blair suddenly yawned though he tried to stifle it. Jim could sense his Guide was tired. It was getting late and they had been running and swimming as their spirit animals all day; Jim suddenly felt tired as well.

“Come on, Chief, let’s go to bed,” he said to his Guide and then turned back to his father. “We’ll talk more in the morning, Dad, once you’ve processed all this.”

William nodded but he was obviously deep in thought.

“Goodnight, Mr Ellison,” Blair said as he stood up.

“Goodnight, Blair, and please call me William.”

“Thank you, William,” and Blair turned toward the bedroom he shared with his Sentinel, the other bedroom made ready for Jim’s father.

“Night, Dad.”

“Night, son,” William replied as he watched his son follow his Guide to their bedroom.

After Jim shut the bedroom door behind him, William stared at the closed door for a long time. His mind was going over and over the scene of Jim changing; he’d never forget that sight. The way the huge black cat’s body contorted, elongated and the black fur receded along with the claws and whiskers. Then James’ naked body was left in its stead, perfectly reverted back to his human form. How was that even possible? Was it amazing or was it an abomination? William wasn’t quite sure and that unsettled him. It was getting close to 11pm William realised by his watch. It had been a long drive from Cascade. William decided it was time for bed himself though he wasn’t sure how much sleep he would get. But he took the cups and coffee pot to the kitchen and locked the cabin. He went to his bedroom, undressed and got into bed. 

###############

Next morning Jim woke his thoughts immediately on his Guide. Blair was fast asleep in the room’s other bed and his heartbeat was steady and even. Jim automatically sensed the area around him for any dangers; he found none but he also found no other heartbeat in the cabin. Jim rose and moved to his father’s bedroom. Opening the door, he found the bed made and no sign of his father. Moving to the kitchen to make some coffee he cast his senses further out thinking that his father had probably gone for a walk at the lake. It wasn’t every day you found out that your son and his Guide were also animals in their spare time.

On the kitchen table Jim found an envelope addressed to him. Pushing aside the kitchen window’s curtain, the Sentinel noted the absence of his father’s car outside. Jim scowled as he pulled out the single sheet of paper from the envelope. His scowl deepened as he read.

Jim and Blair

I’m sorry but I can’t handle this aspect of your Sentinel and Guide relationship. I need to think about it. I’ve gone back to the city but you stay at the cabin for as long as you need to. I’m sorry I just need time to process what you both are.

Dad/William

Jim wasn’t impressed by his Dad’s tone at the end of the letter ‘accept what you both are’. It was if he thought they were circus freaks or something monstrous. Jim wasn’t going to get upset by it, he’d lived most of his life without his father and he didn’t need him now. He was rather disappointed in his father’s narrow-mindedness but it was his loss. Jim screwed up the letter and threw it in the trash. William’s narrowmindedness wasn’t going to spoil their vacation at the cabin. Jim put thoughts of his father aside as he prepared coffee for his Guide who would be waking soon.

###############

Blair glanced over at his Sentinel for the umpteenth time. Jim noticed his Guide kept looking at him surreptitiously. They were sat side by side on a jetty on the shore of the lake in sight of the cabin. Jim reeled in his line and then cast it out again.

“What’s on your mind, Chief?” Jim finally asked.

“What do you mean?” the Guide asked innocently.

“I can see you looking at me but trying not to.”

“I’m concerned for you.”

“I’m fine,” Jim retorted a little too tersely.

“No you’re not,” Blair countered.

“Yes I am!”

“No, you’re not.”

“Fine if you want to turn our conversation into a pantomime, but I am alright, Blair, really.”

“It’s okay to be upset,” Blair said gently.

“I’m not upset, just disappointed. I don’t expect anything from him. When he was at the awards ceremony and we talked I really thought that this time it would be different.” Jim glanced out over the lake, allowing the gently rippling lake surface to calm him. “When my Mom died he lost himself and never really recovered. My Dad has never really accepted me. When my Sentinel abilities first came online and I couldn’t suppress them, I never even thought about contacting him for help. That shows how much of a relationship we’ve got. And now he knows we can change into animals.” Jim closed his eyes and sighed. “He’s gone for good this time. It’s his loss not mine,” Jim added sounding defeated. “I’ve never needed his acceptance and I certainly don’t need it now.”

Blair could hear the sorrow in his Sentinel’s words. At the end of the day William was still his Sentinel’s father and that relationship was important.

“He just needs time to adjust to what we can do.”

“No, we’ve nothing in common and there’s no common ground on how we can patch up our relationship, there never has been. He’s too straight laced; things must be cut and dried for him. He thinks we’re freaks of nature and he’ll think it’s abhorrent what we can do, I know him.” Jim stated resignedly with a sigh. “Well the fish aren’t biting. I’m going for a run.”

Blair expected Jim to pack up his fishing gear and then run into the forest. Instead Jim packed up his fishing gear and started to remove his clothes. 

“You’re going to run as Bagheera?” Blair asked incredulous.

“We’re on vacation aren’t we and besides I can run faster that way.”

“Do you want some company?” Blair asked wishing there was some way he could comfort his Sentinel.

“I…” but Jim could see how upset his Guide was. “I could use your company, my Guide,” he confessed.

Blair brightened at that admission. “I’ll be right with you.” Blair packed up his fishing gear and the two spirit animals were soon loping through the forest together. 

The jaguar ran ahead, leaving the slower wolf behind him, until he was exhausted and flopped down beside the lake’s edge a few miles from the cabin. A few minutes later the panting wolf appeared. Bagheera felt a bit guilty for running so far ahead and leaving his Guide to catch up. But Chief looked bright eyed, his tongue lolling out of his mouth and his tail wagging from side to side. Chief lay beside his Sentinel, their fur touching.

/That was an excellent run. Do you feel any better now?/ the wolf asked.

/I do,/ the jaguar confessed.

/Do you want to go see your father when we get back to Cascade? If you do, I’d come with you for moral support./

/That’s nice of you, Chief, but no, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking whilst I’ve been running. This is who we are now. I’m sad that my Dad couldn’t handle who we are but I’m not ashamed that we can become our spirit animals, I rejoice in it. We are Sentinel and Guide in every way and if my Dad can’t accept that then that’s his problem not mine./

/Okay,/ Chief replied but feeling sad. /I understand./

Chief laid his head on his front paws and closed his eyes for a few minutes. He was aware of a deep rumbling purr from his companion as Bagheera began to groom him. Chief relaxed completely and his spirit soared. The wolf felt pity for the elder Ellison he would never know this contentment. He would never experience this deep joy and happiness. This companionship and friendship that they shared, it was all encompassing. It transcended to the spirit plane and beyond. Chief knew that not even death could separate them now. They would be together in the next life when it was their time. Even if one had to wait for the other, they and their spirit animals would be together again in the next life. Chief felt a certain peace at that knowledge.

/We’d better be getting back,/ the jaguar said sitting up.

Chief watched as Bagheera licked a paw and then moved it behind his ear. He licked it again and repeated the action. Then Bagheera stood and stretched. He turned and started back towards the cabin but at a more sedate manner. Chief listened to the quiet for a moment. It was so tranquil and peaceful at the lake and Cascade seemed a long way from there and then he got up and trotted after his companion. They walked and talked all the way back to the cabin; but Bagheera didn’t mention his father again and Chief didn’t broach the subject. Chief wasn’t sure how it was going to end but he didn’t think it was going to end well. Both men were proud and incredibly stubborn. Neither would give in and it looked like there was nothing that could be done to stop father and son becoming estranged once again.

###############

When they got back to the cabin they stayed in their animal forms. Chief moved to a kitchen cabinet which he opened with his mouth. He routed inside and took out a packet and went back to his Sentinel. He dropped the packet at Bagheera’s feet.

/What’s this, Chief?/ the jaguar asked.

/A packet of those special biscuits I get for you, Bagheera./

/The ones for furballs,/ the jaguar replied a little indignantly.

/You’ve been grooming a lot today and more than normal./ Chief knew it was down to the stress of the situation with his father. /It’ll help dissolve the furballs. If you want to be sick to expel them that’s up to you./

/Good point. Thanks, Chief,” Bagheera replied feeling pleased that his Guide was always looking after him. 

Bagheera put one large paw on the edge of the packet and ripped it open with his strong jaws. He made short work of the chicken flavoured treats inside that were for furballs. They did actually taste quite like chicken.

/Not bad, Chief./ He commented as the crunched and swallowed. Now I think we should have a nap before supper./

/You always say that,/ the wolf teased.

/Chief, a cat is supposed to sleep at least 15 hours a day and I’m a cat./

/I’m down with that,/ he replied. /Do you need to bond?/ and the jaguar nodded. /Good we can do both./

Then Bagheera padded over to the fire and using his strong jaws he put some small logs he’d left ready on the hearth onto the fire, which they had left as embers when they’d left and soon the fire was blazing. 

Bagheera turned and saw Chief had something in his mouth, he dropped it and it jangled as it hit the ground. The jaguar saw that it was a small ball with a bell in it – a cat toy. Chief flicked the cat toy with his paw and watched with amusement the jaguar’s eyes watching it as it rolled over the floor. The jaguar was trying not to react to the enticing toy but he couldn’t resist, he had to chase it. Bagheera caught the ball and batted it in another direction. He followed it around the cabin batting it in different directions and chasing after it until it disappeared under the sofa. He couldn’t get his paw underneath to find it. Bagheera was disappointed it had gone out of reach of his feline form.

But then a crinkling behind him caught his attention and Bagheera turned to see that Chief had something else in his mouth. What’s the wolf up to the jaguar thought. Bagheera soon found out as the wolf dropped the item and putting one paw on it, he ripped open a packet. The contents spilled out onto the floor. Bagheera sniffed the divine scent of catnip. 

Chief walked away from the catnip and walked over to the fire. Bagheera was still sniffing the air; he couldn’t resist walking over to the herb pile on the floor. He sniffed the pile and found it heady, he tasted it and it tasted divine. It was intoxicating. Then Bagheera rolled over the catnip causing the scent to be even stronger and bits of the herb to stick to his back. 

Chief lay down by the fire and watched the show. He didn’t understand why catnip was so intoxicating to cats but it was. Bagheera was in heaven as he tasted and then rolled on the catnip.

/You okay, Bagheera?/ Chief asked as he saw the jaguar rolling on his back over the catnip.

/Ooh yeah,/ the jaguar replied sounding like he was high on drugs and really mellow. /Soo good,/ he added in ecstasy as he rolled over and over the catnip and inhaled the intoxicating aroma.

/That’s what I thought,/ the wolf added laughing.

Some ten minutes later a chilled out jaguar joined his companion at the fire.

/Thanks, Chief./

/You’re welcome, I figured you needed something after everything with your Dad. Was the catnip good?/

/Oh yes, the best natural high you can get. Did you bring any more?/ he enquired nonchalantly.

/I did,/ and the jaguar perked up at that wondering where Chief had stashed it. /But only I know where it is. We don’t want you getting addicted. If you’re a good boy, you can have some more tomorrow./

Bagheera knew the wolf was teasing him but he didn’t mind.

Bagheera lay down in front of the fire and soaked up its warmth. Chief lay down in front of his Sentinel who using his paws, Bagheera gently pulled his companion to his body and held him close as they slipped into the bond and then a welcome afternoon nap.

##############

Jim and Blair spent the rest of the week at the cabin as they had planned to alternating time as their spirit animal personas. The only person missing was Jim’s father, he had been supposed to spend the week with them but hadn’t returned. Nor had he phoned Jim’s cell phone and Jim resigned himself to the fact that he couldn’t come to terms with what he had witnessed. Then it was time to return to Cascade. The drive was quiet and uneventful.

“Are you going to speak to your father?” Blair asked suddenly as they approached Cascade.

“He’s knows my number, Chief.”

“So that’s a no,” Blair mumbled to himself but still looking out of the truck’s side window.

“I heard that,” Jim replied glancing over and looking at his Guide before returning his eyes back to the road ahead.

“Go see him. Talk to him,” Blair replied emphatically. “He’s your father.”

“Leave it, Chief. If my father can’t accept who I am then that’s his problem,” and anger started to edge into the Sentinel’s voice.

“But, Jim.”

“I said leave it!!” Jim stated firmly.

“Yes, my Sentinel,” Blair replied contritely, he knew he had overstepped the bounds talking so firmly to his Sentinel.

Jim felt like a heel then, as he knew his Guide was only trying to help. But Jim knew that the senior Ellison was not only stubborn but he was also prejudiced to certain things. He knew he would never accept what they could do, he couldn’t understand anything that was beyond normal realms. Jim decided he wasn’t going to stress over it or worry about it; it was his father’s hang ups not his and that was the end of it.

Just before they reached Cascade on a quiet stretch of road, Blair took off his clothes and returned to his wolf self. Chief had been seen leaving the loft with Jim and so he would return the same way. It was how Blair wanted it, he knew that the wolf was a much better Guide when Jim was working; so Chief was his companion. Blair was mainly in his human form in the loft when no one else was around; when they left the loft it was always Chief that accompanied the Sentinel. 

There were times that Blair, when he allowed himself to admit it to himself, that if he could stay the wolf all the time he would. Being the wolf was so uncomplicated and freeing; it was so effortless and worthwhile. Looking back at his year as the wolf it had been a surprisingly rewarding and fulfilling time. He’d even received a medal from the Police for his heroism. Blair, at first, had been overjoyed when he’d become human again and could choose to be the wolf when he wanted to. But being human again he had then felt the wolf’s loss incredibly strongly and it soon became apparent to both Sentinel and Guide that Blair would have to change into his wolf persona daily. Being the wolf for the year he had totally embraced his spirit animal persona. A part of it was that Jim needed his human Guide at times; knowing it was harder for Jim to communicate with him when he was in his wolf guise. They had no problems bonding as Sentinel and Guide in whatever forms they were in at the time when the Sentinel needed to bond. 

So, Blair kept a balance between wolf and human Guide. Jim didn’t change daily, sometimes it was a week or more before he called on the black jaguar. But he understood and encouraged his Guide to take on his spirit animal guise whenever he needed to. 

Jim could see how at ease Blair was when he was the wolf; how in tuned he was with his surroundings. How effortless it was for him to be the wolf. He became alive when he was the spirit animal and since the neuter he was calmer and focused. Jim enjoyed being the jaguar but he also enjoyed being human and more importantly he enjoyed being human more. Jim could tell there were times when Blair enjoyed being the wolf more. Jim sometimes wondered if one day Blair might turn to him and ask him if he could stay as his spirit animal permanently again. And Jim knew if that day came then he would give his blessing to his Guide. He wouldn’t deny the one thing that made him truly happy. Because there was always an option for Chief to become Blair whenever he wanted to and that would always be there.

##############

Back at the loft after Jim had unpacked the truck and Chief had changed back into Blair; they set about unpacking, starting some washing and sorting the mail. Whilst they had been away Simon had been over to the loft daily to check and make sure everything was okay. 

Next morning Sentinel and Guide got up and returned to work. Jim spoke to Simon when he got back to the Bullpen and gave him a gift of some cigars for looking after the loft. Jim sat at his desk for an hour checking his cases and getting back up to speed. Chief lay on a blanket at the side of Jim’s desk. He spent much of his time asleep when they were in the Bullpen. Though Chief was always attuned to Henry and Rafe’s comings and goings as they always had treats for him.

Jim was getting back into it when his phone rang.

“Detective Ellison,” he said as he answered whilst still reading a report her was perusing. 

“It’s your Dad,” came the almost hesitant reply.

“Dad?” Jim replied amazed that his father had rung him.

Chief’s ears prick up at that and he sat up to listen to Jim’s side of the conversation.

“I’m sorry, James, for leaving you and Blair the way I did. It’s…I just couldn’t cope with the idea of you…of what you and Blair can both do. I’m ringing to ask for your forgiveness for walking out like that and just leaving a note instead of talking to you both. That wasn’t a very nice thing to do to my son and his Guide, I realise that now. I am trying to change; I want to be a better father to you and I failed at the first attempt. Can you forgive me, son?”

“Dad, it doesn’t matter,” Jim replied, not wanting to get into this conversation at his place of work.

“It does to me.”

“Can we talk about this later I’m at work?”

“I’m sorry I should have thought about that before I rang. I just needed to apologise. Could you come to my house tonight, for a meal, and we can talk? Bring Blair or Chief.”

“Dad, I don’t know.”

Jim looked down to see Chief nipping his ankle.

“I am trying to understand,” William added earnestly.

“Alright, Chief and I will be there.”

“Thanks, son, I, well it means a lot to me.”

“Okay, see you tonight, Dad.”

“Bye, son.”

William was gone and Jim replaced the receiver wondering what he had done. He looked down to see the wolf smiling up at him; at least someone was happy to be going out for supper.

##############

Jim and Chief arrived at William Ellison’s home just after 6.30pm. Jim deciding to go back to the loft after work to change first. Sally the housekeeper opened the front door and she was delighted to see Jim. She showed them into William’s den where he was waiting for their arrival. William was delighted to see his son and his eyes stayed on Chief a little longer than he meant to, as he knew now that it was Blair inside that wolf exterior. 

As Sally turned to leave to get drinks and the starter, Jim turned to her and asked her to set another place for dinner as his Guide would be joining them.

“Of course, Master Jim,” she replied as she left.

Once they were alone Chief changed into Blair. William watched with fascination but he realised he was not repulsed. The first time he had been shocked by what he had witnessed; now he had had time to get used to the idea and actually found he was fascinated by the transformation. 

“Chief always accompanies me when I’m out so Blair is an indoor human,” Jim said with a grin.

Blair gave his Sentinel an indulgent look at his bad joke as he quickly dressed.

“Isn’t that a bit clandestine and hard on you, Blair?” William asked feeling curious about the spirit animal and human double life the Guide lead.

“It’s my choice, William, Chief is more help to Jim on the job than Blair. I also wanted you to see how natural this is for us; how easy it is for us to be our spirit animals and become human again whenever we want to.”

William took this on board and Jim and Blair exchanged looks, they knew that William was really trying to understand their abilities.

If Sally was surprised to see Blair and not the wolf when she returned with drinks and aperitifs a short time later she didn’t say anything. She was a good housekeeper and had kept many a secret for her employer over the years. A short time later they moved into the dining room for the main meal. Sally was as good a cook as Jim remembered. The evening was surprisingly friendly and relaxed as they chatted over the meal.

“Perhaps we can come here regularly,” Blair said as he tucked into his second helping of dessert. “Or perhaps Sally can freelance and cook for us at the loft.”

William laughed and Jim gave Blair an indignant look. “Are you insinuating something against my cooking, my Guide?”

“Not at all, my Sentinel, you are a good cook only Sally in a great one. This peach cobbler is to die for.”

“I dread the day Sally mentions the word retirement to me. I’m not sure what I’ll do then but I will cross that bridge when I get to it,” William digressed.

Blair had had something on his mind the entire evening and decided now to broach it.

“William,” Blair began “as you are Jim’s father there is a chance that he got his Sentinel abilities from you.”

“But I’m not a Sentinel,” William countered.

“No, but you may carry the gene. If you do then you may have the ability to be able to change into your spirit animal like we can.” There Blair had said it.

“That’s absurd, why would I want to change into an animal?” William replied incredulous. 

“Because it’s the most amazing and natural thing in the world,” Blair replied.

“It is the most amazing feeling in the world,” Jim added. “I was sceptical at first myself until the day I first transformed.”

“The point’s mute as there’s no way to find out and I don’t know how to do it even if I wanted to which I don’t,” Jim’s father added quickly.

“I’m an empath,” Blair explained. “I can check if you have the ability, if you’ll let me.”

“No, I don’t want to know,” William replied.

“Why? What are you afraid of?” Blair asked.

“Me afraid! I’m not afraid of anything!”

“You’re a lot like your son, William, it’s hard to think of letting go. That safe feeling of always being in control; to allow a spirit animal to take over your body would sound terrifying. But it’s the most natural thing in the world, it’s…”

“It’s totally ridiculous is what it is, I cannot and will not see myself as a cat or a wolf or whatever. No, I…I won’t entertain the idea.”

“Dad, why don’t you let Blair test you and if you can’t then that’s the end of it. It’s your choice, Dad,” Jim added.

“Fine, to get you both off my back. What would this test involve?” William enquired, part of him secretly wondering if he had the ability. He didn’t know why; it might be just curiosity or something more he didn’t want to dwell on.

“I’m an empath as I explained, I’ll be able to sense your spirit animal. All I’ll need to do is touch your mind, nothing invasive, but if a spirit animal is connected to you I’ll be able to feel them and follow the link.”

William thought for a moment and then nodded his assent. 

“Then we’ll have no more talk of this nonsense,” he stated.

Blair stood and moved forward and knelt next to William’s chair. Blair focused his mind and touched William’s. He searched and to his delight he felt the link to the spirit plane and a magnificent animal was there and answered the call. Gently Blair retreated from William’s mind.

“I felt your spirit animal, he’s waiting for you.”

“What, no, I didn’t expect you to be able to….waiting you say,” William stated both dismayed and delighted at the same time.

“For your call,” Blair replied smiling, knowing that he now had the elder Ellison’s interest.

William was wondering how it could be but he knew the Guide wouldn’t lie to him. He had felt something; he wasn’t sure what it was but he had briefly felt along the link that Blair had channelled but had been too overwhelmed to continue. “How would I…no this is nonsense. I can’t change into an animal.”

“It’s what we’re meant to be,” Jim added.

“You maybe but not me. This is nonsense, no more talk of it. I’ll accept that you and Blair can change into your animals but that’s not for me. Now shall be retire to the lounge for coffee.”

Jim could see that Blair was bitterly disappointed and they exchanged looks but they didn’t press it. Let William think about it for a while and accept the concept for himself in his own time.

##############

That night after Jim and Chief had gone home and William had retired to bed. He had thought about what Blair had told him. When he had fallen asleep he had the most amazing dream about a magnificent bald eagle. William dreamed that he called to the great bird and he heard a squawk in answer. Then William saw himself flying high above a mountain range, he could feel the wind rushing past his wings. He felt his powerful wings obey as he slightly moved them. 

When he woke up he could remember the dream and he felt euphoric and fulfilled. The dream felt so real. He could still remember being the bird, looking through its eyes, feel the expansive wings obeying his every move. And flying so high and free he was amongst the clouds. 

Tears spilled from his eyes he felt so euphoric. He hadn’t shed a tear in over 20 years and he was awed that just a dream could invoke such emotions in him.

William lay awake for some time that night thinking and remembering the dream. He relived the sensations of being in the great bird’s body.

And he realised, with amazement, that he had enjoyed it.

###############

Early next morning Jim received a call at the loft. Jim and Chief were getting ready to leave for the PD.

“Hello,” Jim said, expecting it to be Simon as no one called him that early at home.

“Morning, Jim,” William said.

“Dad, are you alright?”

Chief’s ears pricked up at this and he trotted over to his Sentinel.

“I’m fine. I had a dream last night about an animal,” William began and then paused as he wasn’t quite sure what to say.

“Are you still there, Dad?” Jim asked concerned.

“Um yes, can we meet, to talk?”

“Yes, of course, why don’t you come to the loft tonight for a meal. We can return the favour.”

“That would be lovely, thanks, son.”

“See you tonight, Dad, about 6.30.”

Jim finished his call and then looked down at a grinning wolf.

“Dad said he had a dream of an animal. Do you think he dreamed of his spirit animal?”

Chief nodded his head feeling very pleased with himself. Blair has shown him the way the spirit plane had done the rest. It was calling to William now and Blair just hoped that Jim’s Dad listened to the call.

“We’d better leave work early tonight and go to the supermarket get a few things in and make Dad a nice supper.”

As they left for work Jim was already thinking of what they could prepare.

##############

William arrived promptly at 6.30pm. Blair greeted him and as William watched he and Jim finished cooking their dinner. During the meal William asked Blair a direct question.

“Blair, how would I change into my spirit animal, if I wanted to that is?” William added as an afterthought not wanting to sound too eager.

“You reach for the spirit plane in your mind where the spirit animals reside, your spirit animal will answer your call. Once the change starts it can’t be stopped. It takes a little practice but once you understand it becomes much easier. But I can help you. “

“The first time I tried it,” Jim added. “I was a bit reluctant, that made it harder, if you give your human body to the spirit animal the change is much easier.”

“Does it hurt?”

“No, never,” Jim replied.

“How do you get back?” William asked worried about being stuck as an animal.

“The same way. But you always come back naked, so it makes sense to keep clothes nearby. I felt your spirit animal and I can guide you to him. You don’t have to change if you didn’t want to but you’ll feel him.”

“What would I need to do?” William enquired.

“Nothing just concentrate on my mind; I’ll do the rest.”

Blair touched William’s mind and then reached for the spirit plane taking William with him. William felt the presence of the bald eagle and gasped.

“He’s incredible,” William began feeling his elegance and splendour.

“He is. He’s yours to embrace if you so wish,” Blair stated.

William and Blair’s consciousness’s returned to the loft. William was quiet as he thought over what Blair has showed him.

“The cabin,” Jim said. “Why don’t we go to the cabin this weekend and you can give it a go.”

“I don’t know,” Jim’s father hedged. It was one thing to think about doing it but another to take the plunge and actually change into an animal.

Blair sensed William’s hesitance. “It’s okay to let go, William, no one but Jim and I will see you. You are more like your son than you realise; if Jim can do this you can. What have you got to lose?”

William thought of the magnificent bird. But he was still not sure and if he had to admit it to himself not a little afraid.

“I can’t make any promises but I’ll give it a try,” he finally decided.

Blair beamed at his Sentinel’s father. “You won’t regret this, Mr Ellison.”

Jim was proud of his father at that moment and a swelling of love in his heart he hadn’t felt for him in a long time. He was his father and always would be, but they had spent the majority of his adult life as strangers. It seemed they had something in common with the spirit animals who were bringing them together.

Jim realised he was looking forward to the weekend and spending some time with his father.

##############

Jim, Chief and William drove to the cabin on the Friday night after work. Chief changed back to Blair when they got there having slept most of the way on the back bench in Jim’s truck. They shared a meal together and Blair explained more about the spirit plane, how to change and how they could speak to each other in their minds when they were in their spirit animal forms. The plan was for William to change for the first time the following morning.

So, after breakfast the following morning with the door to the cabin open, they disrobed. William was a little self-conscious at first about being naked in front of his son and his Guide but he understood the necessity of not having clothing encumbering a physical change.

“This is the time to say no because once the change begins it has to complete. Do you still want to embrace your spirit animal, William?” Blair asked.

“Yes, I do,” William replied “Though I have to admit I’m a little apprehensive.”

“That’s understandable,” Blair replied supportively.

“See you on the other side,” Jim encouraged.

“So this is it,” Blair said as he touched William’s mind. 

William was already used to the Guide’s gentle touch on his consciousness and didn’t fear or feel repulsed by it. He let the Guide lead him to the spirit plane. Blair instructed William to call to the bald eagle, which he did and Blair told him to embrace him. William hesitated for just a moment and then called out to the waiting bird and began to change. Blair withdrew his consciousness and he and Jim smiled at each other as they watched as Williams’ form begin to change. His arms elongated and changed into wings and feathers began to emerge. His legs shortened with huge claws appearing at the end. 

Finally, a magnificent bald eagle was staring up at them from his lower position on the cabin floor. William felt strange at first and he felt a little wobbly on the unfamiliar legs. His vision seemed a little strange at first as he looked through unfamiliar eyes. William took a step forward and then another and walked outside. Once outside he unfurled his huge wings and flapped them, feeling their power. 

Blair reached for the spirit plane and changed into his wolf. He turned and watched Jim walk outside. The Sentinel grinned at the wolf and then he ran forward and leaped into the air. Before he had leaped he had already called on his black jaguar. Blair watched in awe as Jim seemed to hover in the air and change in mid-leap. It was the black jaguar that landed on all fours.

/Is that something you’ve been practising/? Chief asked in awe of his Sentinel’s seamless changing in mid-air.

Bagheera grinned smugly at his Guide and then looked at the bald eagle. “You’re magnificent,” he stated.

/Jim, I…/ William began.

/We go by our spirit animal names in our spirit animal forms. I’m Chief and this is Bagheera./

/Why the different names?/ William enquired.

Chief thought for a moment. /We’re separate entities, partly our human hosts but now something more. It helps remind us of our difference. You need a name./

/I don’t know, a nickname wouldn’t suit me,/ William replied a little indignant.

/How about your middle name?/ Blair suggested.

/Charles isn’t quite right for an eagle./ William replied.

Bagheera piped up with /How about Chuck, Charlie, Charlton./

/No,/ was his father’s firm reply.

Chief was thoughtful. /How about Amell. Amell is a German name that means ‘power of an eagle’./

/Amell, I like it,/ the eagle replied.

/It suits you,/ Bagheera added.

/Then that’s settled,/ Chief replied. /Amell it is. Come on gang we’re burning daylight./

Chief and Bagheera watched as Amell unfurled his six foot wings and with a couple of powerful strokes he was airborne. The wolf and jaguar watched with awe and not a little pride as the eagle soared into the air.

Chief and Bagheera start to follow when suddenly Bagheera started coughing.

/Ah, Bagheera, I keep telling you you need to keep eating those anti-furball kibbles./

Chief grimaced as Bagheera was sick onto the ground. 

Bagheera looked grimly down at the black sausage-like furball in the centre of the patch of vomit and pulled a face.

/Yes, Chief. I’ll eat some daily but only when I’m Bagheera./

/Yes, Jim chowing down on cat kibbles would not be a good look but they’ll stop you from doing this. It’s a good job we’re outside and it doesn’t need cleaning up. Now, if you feel alright Amell’s waiting for us./ Chief added.

“I’m fine now, Chief.”

Bagheera looked up to where the bald eagle was effortlessly circling high above them. He grinned at the sight, who’d had thought William Ellison, the stubborn stick in the mud would embrace his spirit animal side. After this, anything was possible.

/Come on then, race you!/ Chief cried and ran into the forest with the black jaguar hot on his tail.

From his vantage point high in the air Amell saw them begin to run and followed. As they loped in the forest around the grounds of the cabin, Amell’s incredible eyesight kept them in sight at all times. When they moved beneath trees, every so often he could see even the slightest movement and odd glimpse of fur move. When they ran over a clear area, Amell dived and strafed them. Bagheera and Chief could feel the breeze his powerful wings created as he flew over them and then watched as he flew higher. He turned in mid-air and flew back and then kept up with them, just flying a few feet above them. 

Amell felt the joy of being his spirit animal. He suddenly understood what Jim and Blair felt and why they did this. It was incredible, he felt omnipotent, the king of the skies. He flew ahead of them and then alighted onto a branch to wait for them to catch up. 

When they did Chief’s tongue was lolling from his mouth and he had the sappiest look on his face. But then Amell saw it in Jim’s face as well, the look of contentment on his son’s face, which he never saw in the human Jim. Amell know understood that what Blair said was true, that Sentinels and Guides were meant to do this. 

Movement to his left caught Amell’s incredible eyesight. A mouse was moving in the undergrowth. On pure instinct he launched himself from the branch after his prey. He missed it and then turned to see Bagheera and Chief sitting on their haunches watching him with bemused looks on their faces.

/I was just flexing my wings,/ Amell defended.

/We saw the mouse,/ Chief replied.

/Ahh,/ Amell replied a little uncomfortable.

/Busted,/ Bagheera replied mischievously. 

/What would you have done if you had caught that mouse?/ Chief asked seriously intrigued.

/I don’t know?/

/Look inside yourself,/ Chief replied. 

/I would have…I would have killed it and eaten it,/ Amell replied suddenly horrified and repulsed in equal measure.

Then it dawned on Amell that he was his spirit animal in all its forms, just like Jim and Blair were, including hunter. It would have been right to eat the hunted, to kill and not eat is a desecration of the life that was extinguished. Hunters killed to live. He would have honoured the mouse by eating it. Amell was beginning to understand what Jim and Blair and Bagheera and Chief were. They were true Sentinel and Guide. Then Amell realised he felt pride and humbled for the gift they had given him. It was a supreme honour to be his spirit animal and he would never forget that.

/Okay you two, alright, I admit it, this is wonderful. You can gloat./

And Amell shook his head when he saw Bagheera and Chief looking at each other with very smug expressions. 

/I understand why you enjoy being your spirit animals but I also understand the need for secrecy. So, the cabin is yours whenever you want it, you’ll be safe here no one comes this far into the mountains. And yes I’ll be coming here frequently too./

Amell knew that he meant what he said and he realised suddenly that he couldn’t give this up either. Because even though he wasn’t a true Sentinel he knew it was what he was meant to be; just like Jim and Blair knew they were what they were meant to be. 

Bagheera and Chief were laughing now in his head and he didn’t mind a bit that they could hear his thoughts and he theirs.

/I’ll meet you back at the cabin,/ Amell said as he launched himself into the air, his huge wings spread and ruffling in the breeze. A couple of strokes and he was gaining height, the ground quickly receding beneath him. /I may be some time,/ he added as he flow off.

/Okay, Amell, see you later. You ready, Chief?/

/Always, my Sentinel,/ Chief replied.

/Come, my Guide, we’re burning daylight,/ Bagheera replied using one of his Guide’s favourite sayings.

Bagheera and Chief took off running. Amell wheeled through the air, he saw the Sentinel and Guide running through the trees and then continued to climb higher. He saw everything below him, the ground coming into focus at will. He wanted to fly forever but knew he had to become his human half again but not yet. He flew towards the far away mountains looking for prey, he was an aerial hunter and he planned to experience that part of his avian condition. He would kill his prey quickly and cleanly and then honour his prey by eating them. But for now, he was just enjoying the sensation of flying. It was so effortless he barely had to move his wings; he just naturally glided on the thermals and air currents. It was the most incredible sensation, and he never wanted it to end.

Amell realised today was the first day of the rest of his life. A rewarding and full rest of his life and he had his son and his Guide to thank for that.

The End.

 

August 2018


End file.
